Blame Game

Updated: Dec 31, 2018


This is one of the most destructive traits we can have. The blame game starts when we blame others for something bad or unfortunate rather than attempting to seek a solution. That includes blaming ourselves when something goes wrong. Reasons for this may include seeing ourselves as inept, foolish, or irresponsible. Looking at the other side we may be inclined to believe our successes are due to external factors, such as fate, chance or luck. 



Here are 5 reasons we play the blame game.


  1. Blame is a convenient defense mechanism. Blame helps us keep our sense of self-esteem by avoiding awareness of our own flaws or failings.

  2. We use blame to attack someone. This is a destructive way to attempt to resolve an issue. 

  3. We tend to make irrational judgments.  The reasons for our own and other people's behavior may not be apparent.

  4. Blaming something or someone else is easier than accepting responsibility. There’s less effort required to accept our role in a bad situation than admitting the fact that we're at fault.

  5. People lie. It’s relatively easy to lie and blame someone else even though we know we’re at fault and hope we never get found out.


What's the cure? Responsibility.  When we take responsibility for our actions we end the blame game. We are accountable for our thoughts and actions, no one else. If you tend to play the blame game, I encourage you to try the responsibility game. I just bet you'll feel better and your relationships with others will improve.

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